Short Answer

“Yes” the command can limit your time away from work.  If the appointments are interfering or causing a problem, unit leadership can order you to take action to reduce your time away from work.

 99% of Military Leaders Care and are Reasonable

Most military leaders have experienced some type of family hardship during their time in service.  Therefore they are usually willing to provide some latitude to Soldiers trying to resolve personal issues.

What if I encounter an unreasonable Leader?

If you have an unreasonable leader in the Chain of Command at the Squad or Platoon level you could seek resolution at the company level via the open door policy with the 1SG/CDR.  It is always best to try and solve the issue at the lowest possible level!

What can I do to get my Chain of Command to support me?

• Develop your discussion before speaking to the Chain of Command
• Think through how you will approach the Chain of Command.
• What is the personality of the individual(s) you will be talking to?
• Do they have children?
• Are there other examples of individuals in the unit that have been given latitude in the past to resolve personal issues (be careful how you use this.  Do not use it as an excuse: For example If you say something like “You let them do it so you have to let me do it- odds are you will not get a positive result)?
• Develop the discussion so that the leader to view the issue by standing in your shoes. The best way to do this is to develop your argument by standing in the Chain of Command’s shoes.  This allows you to see the issue from the other side and usually results in the development of a solution set that works for the command, you and your family.
• MOST IMPORTNATLY-Keep your discussion factual, calm, professional, reasonable and unemotional.  If you construct your argument in this fashion and are able to get the leader to view the issue from your perspective most leaders will sincerely listen.  If you exaggerate or are emotional you tend to lose the leaders as they may see you as unreasonable and too emotional. If this happens you will most likely lose your advantage.

Offer Solutions

Usually leaders will be respectfully of family issues just because they are human too (believe it or not), however if you can provide a realistic plan of action or solution set you provide them the opportunity to help.  Here are some items to consider as possible might include solutions:

Schedule appointment early in the morning or late in the afternoon

• Offer to come in and complete any work that must be completed by the end of the day in your area of responsibility.
• Volunteer to work weekends, late nights, early mornings to make up work that could not be done because you were at the appointments.
• Volunteer to take leave for the appointments.
• If you have a spouse, have the spouse take the child to the appointment or at least rotate the appointments with the spouse.
• Have a caregiver take the child to and from the appointment and you can meet the caregiver at the appointment.  This reduces your time away from because you do not have to drive the child to and from the appointment.

How do I make my request?

You can choose to present your request in writing, verbally, or a combined approach (Seeing the CDR/1SG on open door policy and providing them a written copy of your request they can read during your meeting with them). The choice is yours and should be based on what approach you believe would work best.

 Preparing a draft?

However you decide to proceed you should consider writing your request down and developing a well-structured document.  This allows you to develop the request thoroughly in a professional and factual manner.  If you choose to present your request verbally the time you spend writing the document will help you speak with confidence because the time you spent writing the document will help you recall the areas you wish to discuss.  If you decide to present verbally you might want to make a note card that highlights the points you want to discuss.  This will help ensure you cover all the areas you believe are important to discuss with the Chain of Command.

Ensuring your Chain of Command understands:

• What the issue is exactly?
• How serious is the issue?
• What is worst possible scenario if you do not attend?
• Why is it so important you attend every single appointment?
• What you are doing to correct the issue and get it under control.
• How long do you expect your time away from work to continue at this rate?
• How long will it take to get the issue into a manageable state? For example in the beginning your child may require frequent trips to various specialists. After the initial visit they may only require monthly or quarterly visits to evaluate the treatment plan.  This information is very important to set up a good solution set.

How do I know which format to use in presenting my request?

• Are you comfortable speaking to people in senior positions?
• Are you comfortable speaking in public?
• If you speak to the Chain of Command concerning this issue will you become emotional in a manner that might detract from the outcome you desire?
• Do you believe it is important for your request to be made verbally so that you can share your thoughts, concerns, in a way that impacts the Chain of Command in a positive manner?
• How good are your writing skills?
• Do you need to seek assistance in writing your request?
• What is your relationship with the leaders you will be presenting your request to?

BOTTOM-LINE

The bottom-line is do your homework!  If you can put together your argument in a factual, calm, professional, reasonable, and unemotional manner you stand a good chance of succeeding.  Last but not least- Ask the leader for help.  Most people like to help others, so by using this methodology and asking for reasonable assistance and accomindation you allow a leader to support you.

 This methodology does at least two things.

1. It makes the issue easy to understand when the leader can see the problem and potential solutions

2. By doing your homework and laying everything out you limit the amount of time the leader has to spend reviewing and discussing the issue.  Leaders appreciate this.  When you bring a problem to your leadership bring a solution.

What options are available to your Chain of Command?

The Chain of Command has several options available to them.  These could include:

•  Allowing you to take reasonable time away from work to attend the appointments.
• Counseling you on the issue and requiring you to develop a reasonable solution and potentially provide you a specific timeframe for you to resolve the issue.
• Requiring you to take leave for the appointments
• Requiring you to complete a family care plan.

Note: Failure to complete the family care or properly implement a family care plan it could result in separation from service

Unintended Consequences

Be careful what you ask for.  If you do not think this issue through and fail to properly present this issue to the Chain of Command in a manner that basically allows them to help you it could create a situation that requires you to prepare and implement a family care plan.

Be Prepared

If the issue is serious you might want to put together a family care plan, hire a caregiver, and seek assistance from family members, obtain the necessary legal paperwork to provide others to assist you, etc. should a similar situation occur in the future.

Army Community Service and Other Support Activities

Based on the seriousness and type of issue your child has, there may be assistance that can be provided by the government to assist you and potentially reduce your time away from work.  You can check with Army Community Service at your local installation they should be able to put you in touch with the proper agency.

Battalion/Brigade Chain of Command

What if the Chain of Command at the company level and below does not listen to my request? Then you can consider seeking assistance from the Battalion and/or Brigade Leadership through the Chain of Command and their Open Door Polices.

Inspector General/JAG

Should the Chain of Command at the Company level not be responsive and you do not yet feel comfortable going to the BN/BDE Chain of Command.  You could request assistance through the JAG and IG.  You can seek assistance from them initially without them contacting your Chain of Command.  If they provide you a good alternative or other useful information you can then choose to seek assistance through the company Chain of Command again, request to see the BN/BDE Chain of Command on Open Door Policy, or you could request the support of the IG/JAGs and ask them to contact the Chain of Command on your behalf. Again the best solutions are usually obtained a lowest level of the Chain of Command.  However if this is not possible continue to raise it up through the Chain of Command.

What if you were a civilian employee?

Let’s also take a moment to look at this from another perspective.  If you were a private citizen working for a company or a government worker at the city, state, or federal level; your employer would not allow you to be away from work repetitively.  You would have to take leave to make appointments, when you run out of leave you would most likely have to take leave without pay, and at some point the employer would tell you they can no longer allow you to continue to take time off because it is impacting their ability to provide a service or product.  Now in the civilian world (in some cases) there is the family medical leave act that would allow you to take up to 12 weeks off from work without pay but after that is exhausted your options would be very limited.   My point in sharing this information is that the military is usually far more tolerable than the civilian sector when it comes to helping people.

Summary

I fully understand where you are coming from.  This is your child and you want to provide and take care of your child to the best of your ability.  I have no doubt that properly presented to the Chain of Command they will provide reasonable accommodation.  The average leader is not going to blow this off.  Most leaders have compassion and want to do the right thing within reason.

Hope this helps

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